Season 2 Episode 3
This episode began slowly, but it picked up beautifully, with the march of the French army onto Rome and a whole lot of Cesare.
Wrapping up Paolo
We begin with poor Paolo hanging by the market place. Lucrezia chooses today of all days to wander around checking the wares with her baby and nanny. Cesare tries to take Lucrezia home, but she, of course, figures out something is up. She follows the people thronging around Paolo's body. Lucrezia throws herself at Paolo's corpse and tearfully blames herself. When Cesare shows her the note Paolo supposedly left, her face changes. She faints, and Cesare carries her back to the Vatican. So, how many Cesare fan girls imagined themselves being carried off by Cesare? Just me?
Lucrezia is near catatonic in grief and refuses to feed baby Giovanni. Cesare eventually admits to Rodrigo that he arranged a meeting between Paolo, Lucrezia and the baby at Vanozza's house. Rodrigo is angry at this, and asks if Juan had a hand in Paolo's death.
At Vanozza's house, Rodrigo gives Juan an opportunity to confess to killing Paolo. Juan does not, and Rodrigo climbs over the table to, uh, throttle his favourite son, I guess, only, he does not. Juan tells Rodrigo that if he wants Lucrezia to marry again, he must bury Paolo in a pauper's grave and let that be the end of Lucrezia's shameful affair with a peasant. Rodrigo warns Juan to be careful, else he might find himself wearing peasant shoes.
With the baby wailing in the background, Lucrezia tells Rodrigo she wants Paolo to be given a Christian burial. Rodrigo says this is impossible because Paolo is a suicide. Lucrezia tells him Paolo could neither read nor write; he could not have written that suicide note. The two of them dance around the identity of the murderer, and Rodrigo agrees to give Paolo a Christian burial if only Lucrezia would feed her child. The child, by this time, already has fever, by the way. After she gets what she wants, Lucrezia takes the baby and feeds him.
I am normally sympathetic to Lucrezia, who has been unfairly and brutally used to further her father's ambition, but not here. I cannot imagine letting a child starve, let alone one's own child. She used her son, successfully, as a bargaining chip for Paolo's soul. I understand her purpose, but I cannot condone her method.
Juan
Juan, long the favoured son, is probably unused to being out of favour with his father. He apologises to Rodrigo for Lucrezia and her loss. Rodrigo tells Juan to choose a bride from amongst the Spanish noblewomen, and go there. You have just been banished, Juan.
Juan's method of selecting his bride is by surrounding his bed with the women's portraits while sh@gging a lady I assume is of the evening. The two of them are noisy, and Lucrezia leaves little Giovanni to pay them a visit and scold them. The death of Paolo hovers heavily in their conversation, and before she walks out, Lucrezia leaves her candle by the rope holding a huge chandelier over Juan's bed. The candle burns the rope, and the chandelier crashes on Juan's girl, who at that time was on top of him. Cesare hears Juan's screams for help and rushes in. Juan sees the burned rope and chuckles; his little sister has decided to fight back. Downstairs, Lucrezia sings softly to little Giovanni.
Vanozza dines with her children, and Lucrezia and Juan throw thinly veiled snipes at each other. Juan makes a speech about how difficult it was for them when they first arrived in Rome, at how they had to triumph over many taunts, most of them directed at their mother. Of all the Borgias, Juan seems to be the one most keenly aware and affected by the humble origins of the family.
Juan leaves the Vatican under much fanfare. Cesare and Lucrezia look pleased to see him leave. But then, Micheletto arrives bearing bad news.
The French Advance and the Fake Canon
Micheletto turns King Ferrante's taxidermist into his spy. Through this dude with the creepy job (he is the one who prepares the corpses for King Ferrante's famous supper table), Micheletto learns that King Charles is visited by Caterina and Giovanni Sforza (Lucrezia's former husband --- Am I the only one who finds it weird that Lucrezia gave her son the same name as her ex husband whom she loathes? There were few names back in the day, of course, but there were choices.). This same informer tells Micheletto later that King Charles is marching to Rome with French and Sforza armies. Caterina gave King Charles the Sforza armies in return for cannon to protect her castle in Forli.
The Pope orders the construction of a hundred canons to defend Rome (the two armies will take seven to 10 days to march to Rome). Rodrigo may not know exactly how long it takes to make a canon, but surely he cannot be such an idiot to think it possible to construct a hundred of them in a week. Also, why give the commission to V/V, who is an artist? I understand V/V is necessary to the next part of the canon story, but there is a way to include her --- give the order for the canons to a master of arms, then have V/V do the engravings afterwards.
Anyway, the consistory are angry at the Pope. They think, rightly, that the French king is angry because the Pope tricked him. Cardinals, you left the Pope alone at the Vatican at that great hour of danger. Perhaps you should not allude to that time when criticising the Pope. Cesare brings a miniature canon at the consistory and fires a round.
V/V later informs Cesare that it will take each foundry a month to make one canon. In seven days, all the foundries in Rome can make maybe one or two canons. Cesare angrily throws the miniature canon on the ground; it breaks apart because it is but plaster. Cesare and V/V concoct the plan to make fake canons.
Work on the fake canons progresses swiftly, and Cesare praises them as 'true artistry.' During the course of their conversation which made me wonder if there is a person on earth Cesare does not have chemistry with (Oh, right, Ursula), Cesare realises V/V is a woman. Yes she is, Cesare, and I am ready to ship the two of you, even though V/V slept with your father.
The French send an envoy to Vatican to negotiate 'safe passage' by the French and Sforza armies through Rome. Cesare asks the Pope to trust him this once.
When King Charles and his Italian allies are told that the Vatican will not open its gates, Caterina wonders if they are mad. Caterina gets to show again what a bad-a** she is by suggesting to the French King that they can bathe in Borgia blood together.
Inside the Vatican, the soldiers laugh as they haul the fake canons to the walls. One of the canons is nicked after hitting the wall. A soldier makes the mistake of making more canon jokes, and Micheletto, standing nearby, stabs him and throws his body to the ground. He then instructs the soldiers to pretend the canons are as real as the soldier's blood on his knife. He wipes the blood off his knife with one of the soldier's capes. Love Micheletto.
According to a French general, it will take 12 hours of canon fire to batter the Vatican walls. Cesare tries to assure the frightened Cardinals inside that things will not come to that. Even Rodrigo looks worried. Cesare rides to meet his foes while Micheletto watches from on top of the Vatican walls.
Cesare looks fetching in his nobleman defender of the city garb; even Caterina Sforza noticed. I am surprised Cesare managed to stop himself from directing a few choice barbs at Lucrezia's ex. He was too busy threatening the French King, I guess. Cesare signals, and the red banners fall to reveal the fake canons. Caterina looks specially confused at how Cesare managed to have so many canons. The French general tells the king their battle lines are still forming. If the canons were real, there was a good chance they would annihilate much of the French and Sforza forces before French canon could make so much as a dent on the Vatican walls. Cesare comments on King Charles' illness and tactfully suggests that perhaps the battle should wait until his health is better. Cesare rides back inside the Vatican walls, and the French King orders a general retreat.
Inside there are spontaneous celebrations as the bells ring. Giulia and Lucrezia go to the Pope, and they are later joined by Cesare, who suggests that they melt down the bells to make real canon. He smashes a fake canon ball, and Lucrezia and Giulia laugh and hug him.
Cardinal Della Rovere
The good cardinal returned to Rome incognito and meets with a member of the Dominican Order, which he says he wishes to join. He puts forth his suggestion of murdering the Pope, and says he will go and talk to Savonarola in Florence. Savonarola is a Dominican friar and preacher who became known for his prophecies. When he is informed of the French advance, Cardinal Della Rovere bets that the Borgias will outwit King Charles. The man knows his enemy.
This episode packed a lot. It almost felt like a different show from how it began to how it ended. The episode moved slowly during the Paolo issue, but quickened its beat when Juan left and Micheletto arrived with news of impending war.
Juan's departure makes me sad, because I love David Oakes' portrayal of him. However, I realise that this is an opportunity for Cesare to be more involved in the military aspects of the Vatican, and this, I am very much looking forward to.
Show: The Borgias (Showtime)
Season: Two
Episode Number in Series: 12
Episode Number in Season: Three
Episode Title: The Beautiful Deception
Episode Writer: Neil Jordan
Episode Director: Jon Amiel
Original Air Date: April 22, 2012
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